Thursday, 27 May 2010

TO BE...OR NOT

I have been doing a lot of NOT running lately. Serious.

And that’s NOT all. I have been spending an inordinate amount of free time NOT blogging. I shan’t say, “Sorry I haven’t blogged in so long, but life just been so busy, I have NOT had time.” That would be a lie. I’ve had far too much time, to do much of anything, it would seem.

The up-sides of my new obsession of “NOT” are multiple.

I am fairly certain I have cleansed my body of all those pesky endorphins runners seemingly live for. I have regenerated none of my own over the past few months of sitting on the couch, watching Survivor, praying for Russell’s demise and Parvati’s victory. Nor have I had to deal with Gatorade or Powerade or Accelerade, or any other ade-ade, in order to replenish any other depleted-by-training body liquids. My new pseudo-hobby requires only nightly excursions into the wonder-filled world of Trader Joe’s Two Buck Chuck…and the occasional grilled Velveeta “cheese” sandwich.


I have also saved some hefty cash, during a time when hefty cash is anything but readily available, by NOT putting unnecessary mileage on my Brooks Beasts or my Vibram Five Fingers. I have also NOT had to shell out marathon registration fees. I have NOT run a marathon since December.

I have felt momentarily guilty for leafing through Runners World magazine, being fully cognizant that my world has decidedly NOT been a runner’s of late. Perhaps I should have put my subscription on suspended mode, but I did NOT.

Time was, NOT so very long ago, my first move of the morning would be to check the status of all my online running friends. They often inspired me to put my gear on and head out the door, in the pre-dawn, for a quick six or so. The few times I have perused their early morning postings over the past few weeks have been painful. Their tales of victory and travel have been jealous-making. NOT so much, though, to get me off my butt. Until, well...next week.

I'm NOT doing it now. I was going to do it today,. Really. But Mother Nature decided to batter the Bay Area again today with rain...in late freakin' May! I heard that we got more rain today than we did in the entire month of May last year. That's NOT right. Instead, I have set June One as my target date, for rejoining the world of the living.

I had thought for a time that I was sinking into depression. Realized a couple of days ago that I am NOT. I am, rather, going through stimulus withdrawal. Much of what powered me through last year's 12-in-12 was taken from me this year...namely the job that financed the effort, the commitment to run on a regular basis, and the mystery of whether or NOT I was really up to it. NOT having goals is tough for me, so I have decided to go ahead and act like I have some.

I have the San Francisco Marathon on July 25th...and, even though I am way behind in what would be my normal training schedule for it, I am pouring myself into the time that's left. My goal is to feel, at the end of that event, like I'm fully back in the swing of things. After that, I am going to pretend that I'll have the money to travel to Greece in October for the Athens Classic Marathon. My goal for that one is to PR. 4:45 would be nice. Yeah, let's go with that. Why NOT?

Gotta run!

8 comments:

terry said...

breaks are a good thing, i think...

i find when i've had a break from something i love, i appreciate it even more when i return.

RoadBunner said...

Welcome back! See you at SFM! I am in for the first half!

Ian Charters said...

Glad you are back (:

TokyoRacer said...

Glad to know you're joggin' and bloggin' again.
I suppose the Hamlet photo is how you intend to look after putting in a few months of serious miles. And the caption is: But I don't want to get this thin!

kchealy said...

I've been missing your posts on Daily Mile and your tweets...glad you're committing to getting back at it! I can't fault you for not blogging, having not blogged myself since January. :-)

Now get out there and run this weekend!

leslie said...

Don't know really what to say, except I SO get it. Last year was my year where it was all just too much, and last April I stopped running. Like I didn't think I'd ever run another step. Because who cares? Seriously. So I took some time off, and discovered that I care. Having a goal has been helpful (Big Sur, for example) as none of the situations that took me down has been resolved. But that's life, right? What's that saying, fall six times, get up seven.

Later today, I'm going on a run in honor of YOU!

Michelle said...

It's better to be back than NOT! You'll be back in the full swing come your race day. :)

Karoline Steckley said...

I totally understand, it's been painful to even read blog of friends who are running while I'm not (can't complain because my reasons for not running are positive, but I still miss it). Now I realize that I miss reading things, supporting my friends when they need it and commenting on the beautiful new layout of the blog (great job!). Welcome back and can't wait to read more about your adventures.